No winning

If I lied I lose myself

If I tell the truth I lose you.

Truth Hurts.

Everyone wants you to be happy.

Once you know something, it’s forever. Can’t take back the words and can’t just forget the truth.

The truth hurts- that’s why no one likes to hear it. Life sometimes can be funny. We have people all over the world trying to figure it out. Some get distracted by the superficial meanings in life, while others feel it so much that they just get lost in their own misery.

I failed in being myself and failed even more so at trying to be someone I am not. When you try and become something you’re not, you’ll get lost and do the unethical things rather than what your core stands for.

We are all humans at the end of the day, we all are one at the end of the night. Everyone has two things in common: Life and Death, the in-between is where we become different.

Life is continuous… God is real and living inside of us. Society- we are becoming slaves to what we see and what we think. I wish I can take my own advice; I just can’t, so I am not expecting you to take my advice either.

I view life as being different… I don’t see cancer as a sickness, rather I view it as a lesson. What was the lesson in going through what I went to through? I don’t think I understood the lesson.

Retell your story until you get it right. Find what you stand for and do it. Forget the bullshit and it’s okay to not want to be in the game to play an unfair game. Become your game. Forget washed up people that try and break you and move past the bullshit. You know you and no one else does.

Double sided conversation.

Knock knock!

Who’s there ?

Me.

Me, who?

It’s me, you. The person that has been with you for the last 27 years of your life. Can you let me in?

No.

What do you mean no?

I said NO!!

Why do you always do this?

Do what?

This.

Can you just leave me alone?

No, I can’t leave you alone. I let you be for a little while and now it’s time to man up and get your shit together.

What do you mean by get my shit together? I have it together.

You do?

Yes.

Can you explain to me how then do you have it together, if all you have been doing for the past three years is just waste our time. I get that people and experiences hurt you but you need to let that shit shape you instead. Let me tell you a story about yourself that no one will understand. You are different. In being different, that means you’re special, not everyone will get you, and not every needs to get you. You have everything and everyone around you to support you. Stop acting like a spoiled little child for once. I get that you went through a lot and I am not just saying that to make you feel better. I experienced it with you. I saw how hard you fought. You took over for a while, and now it’s my turn to take back who I am. There are parts of you love and some parts that are no longer needed. If you can find some moderation in your life, maybe, just maybe you will be okay.

Listen… stop thinking that you won this fight. I did.

We both did.