Unsheltered emotions

Why relationships fail, after noticing certain things throughout my life, I was gifted the ability to see past all obstacles through words.

Life wasn’t always apparent, that was never a thing I focused on; we all go through lessons. Lessons that repeat themselves in many different ways, regardless of who you are in the end, everything is interconnected throughout seeing the pattern. When we become comfortable with things, we lose interest and lose respect. Many of us carry the wounds of our childhood into adulthood, leaving behind the child that needed caring and loving.

We’ve been in isolation now for the past two months; this isn’t anything new to me. I love being alone at times, just being the observer. One advice I can give you coming out of a long relationship, if you love somebody and care for them, let them be, You won’t always get the answers you need from that person. Don’t try to show to much emotion people don’t understand emotion when pain is involved; heal yourself by letting the other person grow. Communication is bliss when coming to an understanding. Know that connection isn’t always an option. Regardless of how bad you think you might want something to know that maybe it just was meant not to work out that way.

One thing I never understood was religion, even though I respect people’s beliefs. Faith never hit me.

We are humans, and we can change what we don’t like, by how we react.
Some people will leave that up to God to help them improve who they are without taken any accountability in their actions. Most times, when we don’t like certain things in people, it’s because it’s our insecurity. Many things in life are idiosyncratic. We linearly view life, allowing certain things to fog up the bigger picture. Time isn’t in our favor. The more we waste, the less we live up to our essential purpose.

I noticed a pattern in my life that I attract extremely broken souls. People are always trying to test my beliefs; in the past, I would put up a good fight now. I just let it be—there no need for users to state what we don’t like. Not liking something is also an extremely subjective view of seeing the world.

The world is happening as we speak regardless of what happens inside of the world; it’s happening. Humans have a hard time seeing it happen. Look beyond the surface, look for the soul that speaks to humans and learn how to embrace all things, not just the things that feed your flesh. Nothing goes with you when you die; the only thing left behind is the lesson you choose to teach people that will forever impact them in a good or bad way.

Life without understanding and reasoning becomes a place of unsheltered emotions, and those will be the death of experience in the present.

F.E.A.R

The world we once knew is no longer for the moment. We are losing insight into what it means to live.

The Media is robbing us of our freedom; we are more than labels to experiment on; we are lives.

As a Society, we needed a reset. The earth is healing.

This time, the terrorist doesn’t have a race nor a religion, we can feed into the scare, or we can see the blessings. Going back in time, having my freedom robbed of me from a disease I never thought about dying, I never said to myself today I am going into this to die. Fear wasn’t an option. If I spent time reading statistics, I would’ve died out of fear. After cancer, I came out with a different mindset.

I am a firm believer in the power of the mind; what we tell our mind is what our reality becomes. I am not a doctor, and I am not a scientist; I may come off crazy; this whole thing has been a meaningful trigger. It allows me to resee what I needed to see.

This virus taught me to let go of things we cannot control and accept what we have in front of us. Letting go of pride and accepting each other for who we are. Seeing my parents ‘, this worried only made me realize how worried they were when I was fighting cancer. I have been building a more reliable connection with my dad; we have been playing backgammon almost every day just for him to get his mind off this virus. Knowing that fear can kill the soul, I try and eliminate that aspect of concern for a brief moment in time. I challenge you to do something different after reading that last part, drop the pride.

Vices, we all have them. We are all human; knowing that we have them is when we become self-aware of the issue and fix the problem. If not, we will be building our graves. I never understood why people find it essential to fit into a community of being like for being something they are not. What we let out to this world isn’t always who we are. Self-centered hearts can’t feed a village. We are all in this together.

In each Abrahamic religion, it says thou should love their neighbors. That why starting now, I am letting go of all hate that holds my heart from loving. I want to see everyone win regardless of their plan for seeing me win. I can’t control their life; I can only control my own life and my perception. I am human, and I am flawed, I am all within all, creating my reality. Stay safe and healthy, with love and respect i hope this message reaches you with clarity

Drowning in the storm

You left me confused. I was seeing you change like the drift of the waves crashing the shoreline. Each wave more uncertain of the last one. Seeing you become the typhoon, I knew I didn’t want to drown in you any longer, knew I had to hit the surface to breathe again.

Today’s world

When we become bored with the subject, we lost interest in the meaning of the object. We use words that have meaning to make them meaningless. From personal experience, life has many obstacles, some difficult some surfaced; all are the same when completed. We look for meaning outside of us, losing hope in trying to control things we cannot control. People have this weird issue with emotions bring out a bizarre side of them trying to understand one’s vulnerability.

Being the product of someone else’s opinion or beliefs will only make you then the subject in someone else’s eyes when, in reality, you should only see yourself through your lens. As humans, we lost this connection with God, and we forget that the meaning of how powerful that meaning holds. I was reading the Quran the other day, and it was talking about rain, and what rain symbolized: cleanse, growth, life. When the world is in turmoil, there is always an opposite side of evil, it’s good. In the bible, when one baptized, they are dipped in water with symbolizes purification.

There is a lot that we to reform and then refine, and it’s our belief system on how we view certain things. There are many different levels we face, and facing them with the same mindset will only keep us away from our higher self or God. To me, I learned that seeing doesn’t always mean believing, believing don’t always mean trusting, trusting doesn’t always mean accepting.

Tolerance and control. When we tolerate, we gain control of our higher self, when we try and control, we lost control of power itself. Structure and order, chaos, and mayhem, both are the opposite meaning; there is always a counter the ones meaning. Create your double, saying what life is for yourself. Accept both sides as one. Remember, you are only human.

Nothing subliminal

We are only humans bodying the conscious mind. Leaving us forgetting the bigger meaning to life is.

When there is no meaning, everything becomes lust-filled. The temptation is desires leading us to become less us and more them. Read in between the lines and see for yourself how everything grows. Becoming doesn’t happen overnight. Picture yourself doing what you are doing now in fifty years. Nothing subliminal, just stating what I see.

Accepting the lesson

Let’s get honest for a second, the world is going to shit, and people are don’t know what to do with themselves.

When it comes down to finding inner peace, it’s always been a struggle for me. Lately, I’ve been tapping into my creative side. Seeing people being people has always been a blessing; seeing things with light has always been a blessing. You cannot live life in the past, regardless of how safe it feels there. People will always do what they need for themselves. It is okay knowing that people are figuring it out with or without you. Don’t hold on to these feelings of anger or sadness as they are just here for a brief stay. Life is happening, and it will continue happening with or without you. Some people broke as childern making them unhealed adults, which is hard at times dealing with them know that we all face a different level of life each page isn’t the same for each books, some books are longer than others books. Some books have a different topic than other books, and books here is referring to life.

I want to say this is coming from a place of suffering in the past holding onto it doesn’t heal; trying to fix it doesn’t heal it, letting it go doesn’t repair it. Accepting for it is, and seeing the lesson within is when healing starts. Saying this comes from a place I am learning how to implement in my life.

Clarity

The more that time passes, the more that we lose sight of the things that don’t matter. Growing older, I started seeing that things that do matter. We are all humans; we are all flawed. What gets people is their way of thinking. Beliefs become a condition of their reality. Life is just what life is. There isn’t much more to it, other than the meaning that you create for yourself.

Be content with who you are and forget about all the things that don’t serve you. People change regardless of what you do for people; they will always do what they need for themselves. Some people built up their opinions based on their insecurities.

Don’t be the type of person that loses yourself based on someone else’s beliefs. Their belief is their own experience with how they deal with their own—problems, not yours. The only thing sure thing in life is death. Not much more, we label so many other meanings we forget to live. What is the substance to your life?

Being almost thirty, I can say that I haven’t found my substance; I am learning how to grow alone. Learning stuff alone and spending time with yourself shows you a different side of who you are. Accepting that you are human also is a form of self-love.

Live ,learn, love.

The more we think, the less we become.

The more we think, the less we become.

We are born alone; we die alone. The in-between is where life is lived. There are so many roads we take as people. Many of us get lost; we lose ourselves to the sidesteps in life. Everything happening is the way it’s supposed to be. Don’t get lost in the world of comparing your life to someone’s life. We all face our fears differently. We all escape different, we are all different, yet the same. How is that even possible? Life is a big mystery; we aren’t given much explanation on why we are here. We are just here. We can’t go around hating, and it’s a low vibration. It limits you from growth.

The Missing Piece

The feeling wasn’t there today.

Writing for me is when I am at my purest. I can think about the words and the feelings and allow them to become something other than just built-up emotions that are trapped.

I went into my scan today, and it was my fifth-year scan. Felt completely different didn’t feel like home anymore. I felt like I was alone. In life, we push certain people away to protect ourselves in hopes not to allow new people we let in to hurt us. Life is all about balance; it’s about accepting both sides as one.

Sometimes we make people family, to see that some people never had a family. Family isn’t always perfect, but the core of it is. I can say that this would be my last time remembering you, I lose too much of myself loving you.

The Missing part-

If loving me was meant to be, then it would be, I don’t understand how we became this fucked. It was all about growing up together, loving each other, protecting each other; I guess we allowed the outside noise to distract our internal noise of love.

I think to myself that I showing this side of me to the world would hurt me more than I tell myself that having a voice that can express what it is that feels, is a lot more persuasive than allowing myself to be like others.

A lot of this sounds like its repetitive, don’t know what I hold onto you hurt me more with your actions than I did with my ways of thinking. Having a fucked system growing up isn’t an excuse. Being around the fucked system shows your character.

I won’t sugar coat it, ill tell you how I see it, Didn’t build you to this point to watch you break back to where you once were. Inside the magic within us all lies this little voice that needs to be heard and expressed. Love you more than I love myself isn’t the right thing to do, thank you for always showing me that peoples true colors always show at the end. This lesson you taught me showed me that people will always be people and that this so-called true love isn’t so accurate with who you think it was supposed to be with; true love starts with loving everything that is happening as one.

We will leave that for another day, or maybe we’ll go for a day when Instagram needs a new post.

No winning

If I lied I lose myself

If I tell the truth I lose you.

Loving yourself

Breaking someone’s reality can be hard.
When you tell your truth, it hurts their deception of you and the world.

Life keeps going.

As people, we are blessed and cursed with this thing call Awareness. The conscious mind tells you what is right from wrong.

Most people know how to tell the difference.

I see a split world from time to time, or maybe it’s the people I allow myself to see.

I know there are transcendent people out there in this detailed world.

The thing is many people are not willing to receive messages. They are just not there yet. I am learning how to see the world for what it is. No bullshit no gimmicks, Just seeing what the world shows me, with no judgment. I cannot save the world, because this world is perfect the way it is. Just like you and I. What is happening will always be happening. It doesn’t mean you can’t change what is going to happen. Your reaction will forever shape what will happen next. You decide.

There are many different cultures in this world. So many different people are living life — so many different versions of ourselves in different bodies.

I try and see myself in others; I try and relate to others, I try and give others advice. Empathy is the key to humanity and genuine kindness. Like I said before, many people aren’t ready to receive a message they aren’t prepared for yet.

What people see you as will always be a reflection of who they are. They are just trying to bring their insecurities on to you. Remember this, you matter. Want to know how I know? Because you are reading this and you are ready to receive the message. Be nothing more than who you were meant to be — the best you. If you give a lot it because you are a lot, nobody gives what they don’t have.

With love and respect, I hope you find what you need from this world.

A little less you.

I am tired of fake smiles, fake people, and an artificial world. I tried to hold it together for things and people, somethings never change. We all have flaws, we all do stuff the makes our egos feel a bit better. I need to heal, and healing doesn’t start with the people that hurt you. Healing begins with forgiving yourself first, then forgiving the people that hurt.

The same toxic cycles will never heal you; some people never grow past their high-school days. I used to think that I wanted to fit in. There is nothing to fit into a world that is already dead. We are preoccupied with bullshit every day. I need to and want to get the fuck out of this mental prison.

As I go through my journey of life, I start to see where I survive isn’t where I am supposed to be. I don’t belong in a lethal cycle. I know myself better than anyone else. I know how I think. Life after disease, I rose to notice I wanted to be more me then be more what others want to me to be.